There are a lot of nasty things that you will find in a person’s bathroom. I don’t need to go into detail here…you probably all have at least one thing in your bathroom that would make your mothers upset. My apartment bathroom is no exception. It’s not everyday though that I find something that grosses me right the fuck out. In college I lived on an all male dorm; the things I have seen in a group bathroom would make Mother Teresa nauseous. That being said, I yesterday found a toothbrush lying right next to my Irish Spring bar soap in the shower. I use my soap to wash all the parts of my body. If one of my roommates wanted my balls in their mouth, I could have teabaged their ass and skipped the middle man completely. On the flip side, I don’t want somebody else’s saliva to be transferred to other parts of my body. It is goddamn nasty.
If that wasn’t disgusting enough, I today found a dildo in my shower. It was nestled all inconspicuous like right next to the shampoo and body wash almost like it belonged there. I didn’t even notice it was there until I was nearly done showering. So I know you are thinking “so what. It is a dildo.” right? Well, a disturbing fact is that there are four people living in this house, and not a single one of them is female.
That picture is not setup in anyway, but sits exactly as I discovered it. The burning question in my mind is, who’s ass has it been in? It isn’t the first time that this kind of thing has happened; one roommate thought it would be funny to sculpt my soap into the shape of a penis. Why? Well, he is obviously a flaming homo in denial. What he doesn’t know is what I did to his body wash. 
A reoccurring theme? Most definitely. I guess the old saying is true: All the soap in the world won’t wash the gay away.
The CDC announced today that STDs among Americans are increasing at alarming rates, led by chlamydia. Nearly 1,031,000 cases of the clap were reported last year, up from 976,000 the year before. This number eclipsed the 1,013,436 cases reported in 1978. 19 – fucking – 78. The late 70′s were a church ladies nightmare!!! HIV hadn’t reared it’s ugly head yet and fashion was so god-awful repulsive that people couldn’t wait to get out of their hip-huggers and liesure suits to fuck.
President 
Do you feel guilty when you see Michael J. Fox twitching on your television? Do you shed a tear when you have to remind your grandmother with Alzheimer’s who she is? Does it piss you off that blowhole Republicans, in their desperation for votes, pretend to be advocates for all forms of life — including stem cells. Lets remember that this is the same group of assholes that brought us the legalization of assault rifles, and manditory minimum drug sentencing. So, if the right is so concerned about the sanctity of 16-cell life, while the rest of us give a shit about actual people stricken with 
